The difficulties faced when planning for a family

The difficulties faced when planning for a family

It’s not always easy to have children. I remember being in my 20s and thinking that children can wait until my 30s. Once I’m settled down, married and have my own home. The traditional way to do it? These days, compared to my parents generation, it seems like people are having children later in life. No longer is it a rush to have children, preferring to wait until they are financially settled in their career. However it’s not always easy to have children, and there are many difficulties faced when planning for a family.

I remember being asked after my first when I would be having my second. This question was asked pretty quickly after my daughter was born, and I was pretty shocked by it to be honest. I had just spent nearly 10 months being pregnant, and 60 hours in labour. There would be no way another one would be on the cards quickly after that, and it’s not until three years later than I’m soon-to-be expecting my second.

Couple making decisions

I do count myself as one of the lucky ones. However I know plenty of people who have struggled to have children, through no fault of their own. They could be waiting for or trying for IVF, and my heart goes out to anyone who goes through it. The agonising 2-week wait at the end of it would be awful. Any couple or future parent experiencing it, well you just rock, and you one strong person or set of people.

You may not be in a relationship, but desperately want to have children. It’s perfectly possible to do this with the advanced sciences that are around today. There really is nothing wrong with that. You could consider a dating website to become a parent or seek a donor, which can help you make that giant leap towards pregnancy and parenthood.

Or you may be in a single sex relationship, and again desperately want to have children. Again, this is perfectly possible and there are many options for reaching that milestone today.

Lastly there are some people who simply do not want to have children, and this shouldn’t be frowned upon. Not everyone wants children. Some because they know it’s not medically possible, and others because it is not right for them, nor their lifestyle. That’s fine.

Newborn Baby

For us having our daughter was amazing. I count my lucky stars that the route to pregnancy wasn’t difficult, and that my pregnancy was also pretty smooth as well. I’m also blessed that we are expecting number two in 3-months time. Yet at the same time worry constantly that something might go wrong, worry about a difficult labour, and then worry about looking after a newborn with a toddler on my hands. Not to mention the sleepless as well.

So the full journey to parenthood and during parenthood isn’t easy. There are so many decisions to make when it comes to family planning, and it needs to be right for you and your partner. Don’t be scared to talk together about having children. If you are experiencing difficulty in getting pregnant then don’t be afraid to start talking to medical professionals sooner rather than later.

Good luck on your journey.

Claire x

The difficulties faced when planning a family

This is a collaborative post. 

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4 Comments

  1. Hayley @ Mission Mindfulness March 4, 2018 / 10:02 pm

    Claire – what a lovely post – very empathetic – and a reminder of me that just because someone hasn’t gone thro a challenge st TTC doens’t mean they can’t understand….you are so right about the TWW after fertility treatment….nerve wracking but also PUPO (pregnant until proven otherwise) is a wonderful feeling too….one day I will be able to write about this on stuff on my own blog…. when I feel ready to xxx

  2. Thompson March 17, 2018 / 2:23 pm

    Thank you sooooooooooooooo much !!!!!

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