Mama and child at the beach
Parenting

What I wish I knew before I became a Mama

I’ve been doing this parenting malarkey for nearly 3 years now. 3 years ago I kissed goodbye to my old life, and hello Motherhood. To be honest it hit me like a ton of bricks, I had no idea what to expect. Going from a lifestyle where I worked hard and played hard, to looking after a tiny human, was a massive culture shock. There was so much I missed, and there was also so much I wish I knew before I became a Mama. So for anyone who is on the brink of parenthood, here’s what you need to know.

Appreciate the lie-ins

You will never know tiredness until you have had a baby. Newborns have a tendency to keep you up all night. If you think you can handle it after getting used to being up all night partying, trust me looking after a baby is not the same. They will drain the life out of you, and you will start to hate the nights. So any lie-ins or early nights that you can get now, enjoy it. A lie-in with a baby or child is nothing beyond 7am (if you’re lucky)!

Go out with the girls

Once the little one arrives your opportunity for drinks and dinner out will be severely limited. If you’re breastfeeding and have a baby permanently attached to you for 6 months, sneaking away for an evening out is a big no-no, unless you’re fortunate enough to have a baby who drinks from a bottle. However do not count on that. Go on enjoy yourself. Go out for dinner with the girls, and have fun whilst you can.

Nights out with the girls

Have date nights with your partner

When the baby arrives it will be you and the baby for what will seem like forever. Date nights and trips to the cinema will feel like a distant memory. In fact you might even forget you have a partner or a husband, as you’ll be so absorbed in looking after the little one, you won’t have much time to consider anyone else. So make sure you enjoy a few meals out before the little one arrives, as it might be at least a year until you are both brave enough to leave the baby with someone whilst you both go out at the same time.

Go on holiday

If you can have a baby-moon. This is one last holiday before the baby arrives. Enjoy being able to relax in the sunshine or be pampered whilst you can. Never again will you be able to lie on a sunlounger in peace and read a book, or sit in the sun at all. You can still go on holiday, but they just won’t be what you remember. You’ll spend half the time trying to get the baby to nap, and worrying about if they are too hot. Plus if you’re all sharing a room you’ll have to hide in the bathroom whilst they fall asleep.

Do up you home

Whilst you can and before children arrive, do up your home. It might seem easy to paint a room now. However once children arrive it’ll be virtually impossible to do any DIY unless it’s after work in semi darkness, or with a toddler running around your feet. So if you are planning any DIY or house renovations do it before children arrive, otherwise you’ll end up throwing additional money at it by getting workmen in.

Excel as much as you can in career

Now I hate to have to tell you this ladies, and even though there is so much talk about flexible working once you have children, the juggle of parenthood and having a career is very hard. Yes, you can keep on working, but the reality is, is that some companies may see motherhood as the end of your career. I’m being brutally honest and that’s the reality of it. You may not agree with this, but it is best to get as far up the career ladder as you can before the little ones arrive.

Relaxing on holiday on the beach

Love your body

If you hate your body now, please don’t! Once you have children your body will never look the same again. Your boobs will sag, and your tummy will not go back to how it was. Plus you may have a weak pelvic floor and core after pregnancy and childbirth. If you can love your body now, before it changes for good.

Enjoy long lazy afternoons in the pub

This was something I loved pre-pregnancy, and it was something that I could still do with a newborn baby. However as your baby gets older, it becomes harder and harder to while away the hours by a cosy log fire with a pint. Enjoy those Sunday afternoons, and also enjoy being able to drink on your own time.

Stop worrying

Lastly if you’re worrying now, please stop. When you have children the list of worries is endless……Are they getting enough milk? Are they sleeping for long enough? My baby doesn’t nap? Will they ever stop crying? Are they warm enough? Are they too hot? If you’re worrying pre-children, your list of worries is going to get a lot longer. So stop worrying if you can.

Having a child is a wonderful thing. It’s a rewarding, exhausting, challenging, and overwhelming thing to do. It’s certainly something not to be sniffed at. However before the little bundles of joy arrives, make sure that you appreciate all the things that you can do without children. I’m not saying you can’t do the above with children, it’s just harder.

Was there anything that you wished you knew before you became a Mama?

Claire x

What I Wish I Knew Before I Became a Mama

24 Comments

  • Five in the hive

    Agree completely with this post, if I thought I worried before my children my goodness I don’t know what I’d call it now. We’re also trying to decorate at the moment and it’s just not happening, we’re literally painting it by the square metre at a time thanks to our mini person! #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Mummy Nuthatch

    Yes yes yes. Every point in this post I was thinking ‘totally agree’, ‘so true’. Nothing can prepare you for how your life changes when you become a mummy, but this provides a good insight! Most of these hadn’t even occurred to me until I read this!

  • Jenny Curtis

    I’m with you on the decorating, haven’t even attempted any since our daughter dropped to one nap a day, we just get people in! Even putting a picture up seems like too much of a task. 3 year old in the toolbox again! #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Michelle | The Willow Tree

    I think it is so important for us Mama’s to feel comfortable in our own skin and to not be so critical of how we look…all the time! I know I am guilty of this and notice the changes in my body more than ever after pregnancy and just being a Mum. Its hard to hide these bags! #fortheloveofblog

  • Helen aka Welsh Mum Writing

    This is all so true. As an older mum it was easy for me to tick off the career ladder bit, but I definitely should have done more to socialise. We have no real support with childcare so going out has to be something we do separately and even then it’s rare. I wish we had done more as a couple and taken the opportunity to do a bit more travel or spur of the moment stuff. Everything now is like planning a military campaign! #fortheloveofBlog

  • Tubbs

    So true. I remember having a big notice up in our kitchen when the Tubblet was tiny saying, “This too shall pass and you will all survive”. It’s so easy to get caught up in the moment that you forget that things will change for the better.

  • The Squirmy Popple

    I totally agree with this post – I can’t believe how much free time I had before parenthood that I didn’t appreciate or take advantage of. I struggle to remember what I did with myself, to be honest. Not enough! #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Briony

    All completely true. I also wish I’d known that l would actually be ok at this parenting gig. Not perfect but actually pretty ok at it. I would have been less stressed. #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Chloe

    Hi, Loved reading this and all very helpful points I would say yes get the holiday in and try and make the most of the lie ins #fortheloveofBlog

  • Mrs Mummy Harris

    All of these are so true!! I used to hate my body but now I look back at my pre-baby body and think wow!!! Becoming a parent really makes you realise what you had and what you took for granted! #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Kate Holmes

    So many great points of the stuff to enjoy whilst you can do so easily before the parenting gig kicks in. I think I just wish I had had a better clue about what parenting entails and how society really still does not support you in parenting as much as it should in my view. Mine are older now so I am recapturing more of me and some of the joys like a social life for what seems like the first time in decades! #FortheLoveofBlog

  • Ali Duke

    What a great post. There are so many things people don’t tell you about becoming a mum/parent, posts like this really help parents and parents to be.
    #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Mum OverRun. Sarah Aslett

    Honestly the “worries” I had before I had kids are laughable now. I thought my life was so stressful lol! Trouble is being a parent telling people without kids how it really is – doesn’t often go down well haha #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Malin

    Good post! There isn’t really anything I wish I’d known before becoming a parent, but there are some things I’m glad I didn’t know, as they might have stopped me from ever having a child. One of the things you mentioned above, the worrying, was something that a workmate told me about after he had his first child (about a year or so before I had mine). And he said, very wisely, that he’d realised that it’ll never end; While they’re little you’ll worry about the things youve mentioned above, then later you worry about things like friendships, mental health, education, independance, love, drinking, travelling, accidents, housing etc. And ‘will they be happy?’ x #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Lisa Pomerantz

    It always comes down to SLEEEEEEEP! Whether it’s not enough for me, or they won’t go to sleep… I wish I had napped all the times I declared with strength and power, Nope. Not tired. Not me. 🙂 Great post! #fortheloveofBLOG xoxo

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