Pushing buggy in the park
Parenting

That used to be me……

I’ve been back at work for 6 weeks now, and my maternity leave seems like a distant memory. I decided to write this post after being envious of all the Mum’s I saw in the park last month whilst I was taking my daughter to the doctors. 

That used to be me pushing my buggy around the park everyday come rain or shine, doing lap after lap trying to get my baby to sleep

That used to be me having a picnic in the park on a sunny day with my NCT friends and their babies.

That used to be me spending hours in cafes and coffee shops with the NCT girls drinking coffee and eating cakes all afternoon.

That used to be me spending Friday afternoon in a local pub, having lunch with a glass of wine, and then taking our babies into the soft play.

That used to be me going to Baby Sensory on a Tuesday morning, and Baby Bounce on a Friday morning. Seeing my baby’s love of music and singing develop.

That used to be me having random play dates in the week with friends.

Today’s me is running digital web build projects, organising teams, and making sure a project hits it delivery deadline on time and on budget.

Today’s me is taking my daughter to nursery, and leaving the office at 5pm every day to pick her up.

Today’s me now worries if she is getting enough sleep and food whilst at nursery, is she happy there, and has she made friends.

Today’s me is now juggling fitting in work, nursey runs, cleaning, cooking, doing the washing, loading the dishwasher, ironing shirts for my husband, changing nappies, feeding the baby, and playing with the baby.

Today’s me has little time for me.

Maternity leave is so short, it may seem long when it begins, but it is so short. Enjoy every minute of it, it passes by in a blink of an eye – as does the first year of your baby’s life. I didn’t write this post as a sad post, but after seeing other Mum’s in the park yesterday, it made me look back at what a great time maternity leave was and how much I miss it.

Claire x

Pushing buggy in the parkThis post was first published on Meet Other Mums.

The Pramshed

63 Comments

  • Maria

    Ahhh I completely emphasise Claire. I loved maternity leave (both times) and really didn’t want to go back to work. Now I miss the baby stage whenever I see mums pushing newborns around! 😉

  • Angela Watling

    Oh my goodness, yes. I can completely relate to this! I’ve been back at work for over 6 months now and I’m glad to be back (for the most part!). But when I see mums on Mat Leave and with young babies, something in my gut feels unsettled. Over the months I’ve come to realise I’m a little sad that time is over and I’m also a little jealous!

    But at the same time, my daughter is now running around like a nutcase and bossing me about. So everything has it’s time and getting your independence back and watching your daughter gain hers is an exciting new time!

    All the best settling in to your new routine. Your LO will soon love nursery. Mine has the time of her life with her friends and enjoys being home all the more when she’s back. xx

    • The Pramshed

      Yes I am sad it’s over too, it’s a year of my life that I will never have again. Just like us there are now new groups of Mums, a constant cycle. It’s lovely that my daughter is enjoying nursery and she’s developing at a rate of knots now 🙂 x

  • Back With A Bump

    I don’t do any baby groups bit know I’ll miss my maternity leave when I go back to work. Right now I kind of miss working some days but know I’ll feel different come January!! #fortheloveofblog

  • Jane Taylor Maflingo

    This is a really thoughtful post, Claire, I love the way it’s written. I can understand the yearning for those special days of maternity leave before the return to work, where your need to multi-task and reshuffle life is even greater. I hope you find a balance and also enjoy being ‘the work’ you again too. Thanks for hosting #fortheloveofblog

  • Themotherhub

    I have no desire to have another baby – but I’d love another maternity leave ! Such a lovely time. I hope you’re settling into routine and find some time to look after yourself amongst all the routine #fortheloveofblog

  • Jess

    This is so true I am coming to the end of my maternity . When it started I worried about how I was going to fill my days . Now I never stop and not looking forward to not doing it all and being at work . #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Geraldine

    It really is so short and the transition from maternity leave to back to work is tough and heartbreaking. It’s so unfair that we have to be away from our babies #fortheloveofblog

  • Let your light shine Mummy

    Ah bless you. You’re right it goes far too quickly, a year really is no time at all. You’re doing a great job, and the things that today’s you does will impact your daughter in a positive way. I’m sure that once you have settled back into work you will find a good balance. I remember going back to work first time around, and really enjoying some ‘me’ time and adult company. Not to take away from my boys but we need that too. Thanks for sharing xx #fortheloveofBLOG

  • theirishbabyfairy

    I’m back to work from maternity leave in about 6 weeks, dreading it. I haven’t been as busy as you on my maternity leave but I will miss my little baba so much. It’s the juggling everything that scares me too, where will there be time for everything? Hope things are settled for you now #ForTheLoveOfBLOG

  • From Day Dot

    This is such good timing for me as I have one week left in work before I finish work for 9-12 months. I’ve already been thinking about how fast time is going to fly and it’s stupid but I feel sad about something ending before it’s even begun! I’ll certainly make the most of every minute 🙂 #fortheloveofBLOG x

  • Kelly

    It’s just having that time isn’t it that you miss? We have so much to fit in to everyday those months of just having time are so precious #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Happy Mummy

    Claire, I know how you feel, I felt like that but then in June I got made redundant & I have had the most amazing 3 months off with Miss H; I start my new job next Monday & it feels like I’m returning from maternity leave all over again #fortheloveofBlog x

  • Emma

    I’m so glad I read this because I’m on maternity leave at the moment and I keep feeling like I’m wasting time but I have to remember that time is short and precious and I can’t feel guilty for this time off because I won’t get it back again. #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Catherine Evans

    I hope it gets easier for you. If I am honest, I was only back three weeks and I handed in my notice. I just couldn’t do it, but I am also a university student in my third year so that is how I justified it! At least you were lucky enough to have the maternity time, that is the most important period! #fortheloveofblog

  • Amie

    Another lovely post 🙂 I was lucky that I did not need to go back to work, I would have been super envious too! I still wish I could go back to the small baby days with the chunky prams. Now it’s just a title stroller and a baby sling! #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Claire

    I loved this post when i read it on MOM. I’m rapidly approaching the end of Mat leave and I’m not sure whether to return to work, but even if I don’t ill miss this year, it’s been challenging but amazing. #fortheloveofblog

  • Jo (Mother of Teenagers)

    Maternity leave – wow that is a long distant memory. I have to say whilst I loved it I was glad to get back into the swing of work after my eldest was born, but you are right it is tough to juggle all those balls of nursery runs etc and holding down a job. Hope you get some quality family time at the weekends. #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Twin Pickle

    Luckily I was in the UK when I was on maternity with my daughter as here in the US the Moms are back to work at 6wks!! I just don’t know how they do it. Statistically more people breastfeed here too so there they are pumping away at work to build up their freezer stash for daycare. So tough. I hope you manage to find some time for you too, it’s important but takes time to figure out once back at work. #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Claire

    Funnily enough, my name is Claire, I’ve just joined Meet Other Mums #blogsquad and my maternity leave ends in a couple of weeks! The world is full of coincidences! I hope you found a balance, I’m terrified, especially now I’ve discovered blogging and realised I want this to be a wahm! xx #fortheloveofblog

  • Kristin McCarthy

    The return to work was killer- it did get a bit better with the second baby- but I was home for half a year with her- so totally different experience. I hope you are able to push through these challenging days!

    #fortheloveofblog

  • Cathryn

    Oh you’re so much braver than I am. I couldn’t go back. I did one keep in touch day and couldn’t do it. Luckily it was the push I needed to go self employed!

    Great post.

    #FortheloveofBLOG

  • Eliana

    I’m going back to work next week after 8 months of maternity leave! T_T I don’t know how I am going to face it but I will probably have those times as well of “That used to be me…” Hope my baby cuddles will help me smooth that transition..
    #FortheloveofBlog

  • Cherry at The Newby Tribe

    I’m still in adoption leave with my kidlets, and often wonder how I’m going to feel when I go back to work – I’m trying really hard to enjoy every moment of it knowing that, far too soon, it will all come to an end! #fortheloveofblog

  • Bridie By The Sea

    I love this post. This is me at the moment and I can’t help but feel the same – everything has changed in an instant, and although there are positives to that, there are always those moments of doubt. Thank you for hosting #fortheloveofblog

  • Kate

    It all passes by so fast and when we are exhausted its sometimes hard to focus on how wonderful it all is. Thanks for the reminder to treasure every moment. My daughter is in Kindergarten now and I miss her so much! #fortheloveofBLOG

  • alisonlonghurst

    This is a really lovely post. I didn’t read it as being sad, just whimsical and so, so true. Alison x #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Topfivemum

    If it’s any consolation, I’m off on my second maternity leave (I only went back to work for 6 months as I was already pregnant when I went back – yes, that went down well!) and I still look at mums with their babies and think ‘that used to be me’. Because with two under two, there is definitely no chance I can do everything I use to do first time around as I’m busy trying to keep my very independent minded toddler happy. I miss those easy first baby days too. However, I have the hindsight of knowing how quickly my first mat leave went and I’m trying to enjoy every moment of it this time before it passes me by. This will definitely be my last mat leave and I know I’ll think like this too when the time comes. #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Sonia

    Must be a big jump going back full time. I was lucky to be self employed and though I didn’t take much time off when my babies were born, I have remained part time and can pick and chose work to suit being a mum. Now the youngest is at school, I’m virtually back to being full time in the number of hours I work and being off completely seems like an age away! #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Kimberly

    Oh my goodness you’ve made me really want to stop time. I’m halfway through my second (and last!) maternity leave and it’s just started to accelerate out of control…
    Thanks for the reminder to enjoy every minute! (when I’m not being sicked on or screamed at)
    Kimberly x

  • Jaki

    Aw bless you. It is sad. I’m so lucky I have the best of both worlds just working mornings. If nothing else this post has made me extra thankful this evening. I hope you feel a bit better about it soon. #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Abi

    I’ve been feeling like this a lot recently and I am a stay at home mum! I moved back to the UK about two months ago and am still friendless! All I see are maternity leave mums revelling in their new Mummydom while I am chasing two feral toddlers across the park, dreaming of the stale wine I have at home and dreading the fact that I have a mountain of ‘house admin’ to do (read that as laundry, cleaning, cooking, groceries, etc). I sometimes long to be at work because then my kids wouldn’t trash my house every flipping day! #fortheloveofBLOG

  • Grounded Mummy

    The first year really does go by so fast, doesn’t it? I haven’t gone back to work after my two and I really do miss it. I know there is no easy route for mums, we feel guilty whatever we do, and it’s hard leaving little ones at nursery or wherever but you are an incredible role model, working, blogging, being a mum, along with everything else. I’m guilty of it too, but always remember to make time for you too! (I’m talking to myself here too!) hope it all gets easier soon (or number 2, maybe?!) #fortheloveofblog

  • Sarah (2 brides 2 mums)

    Such a lovely, honest post. I went back to work after 6 weeks (my wife gave birth to our boy so is the one staying at home with him, especially as she is breastfeeding) and it was such a massive change to leave that baby bubble and get back into work mode. I miss my son constantly, especially after spending lovely weekends as a family, but try to remember I am providing for my family and setting a good example to my son

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